An IMPORTANT letter specifically addressed to the women of Christ that can't seem to find love, and don't know what they're doing wrong!
Hi, my sisters in Christ. Before I start, I wanted to make sure you know a couple of things. And I hope they are drilled into your identity just as your name, your family or your blood type is. Just another one of those things that cannot be changed:
(Proclaim them aloud over yourself right now)
You’re beautiful, made in God’s perfect image.
You are chosen and called.
You‘re strong and more than capable of anything.
You are special and deserve the very best.
You are greatly loved by your Heavenly Father.
Do you believe in all these things? The answer better be yes, because each one of these truths come from your creator, and He is never wrong. By saying something doesn’t apply to you, you’re directly disagreeing with God, and I don‘t think you have the gounds to do that!
All right, now that we know who we are in Christ as women, I have one thing that confuses me.
Why is it that so many women (including myself at one point) act like they are not worthy, valuable or deserving of a beautifully orchestrated love story? That’s right, I want to talk about love today. Your love life, ladies.
That’s right, I want to talk about love. Your love life, ladies.
I don‘t want to put every woman in the same basket because of course we all have our own background, destinies, and individual promises of God. But when women find themselves in a state of desire, of looking or aspiring to find someone and celibacy is not for them, a little mistake tends to happen.
One thing that makes me so sad about that drive and desperation is that a lot of women end up abandoning any form self-respect in order to find a man. And I'm sorry to be so direct, but I've had enough of watching beautiful women of Christ put themselves down simply because of their impatience.
Yes, I see that the pool of godly men is thinning out by the day somehow. But our God is still a mighty God, one that does not require us, as sisters, to all chase after one man that meets maybe 50% of those characteristics because that is as good as it will get. So many girls choose to settle because it means saying yes to someone right now, right here, rather than going back into the waiting room. Remember, just because the blessing hasn't come RIGHT NOW, it doesn't mean it NEVER will.
So many girls choose to settle because it means saying yes to someone right now, right here, rather than going back into the waiting room.
I see some men in the church that are nowhere near close to getting married, where their relationship with Christ still needs a lot of growth and maturity. And that's fine, we all go at our own pace. Yet, so many girls chase after these particular men, fighting against each other for their attention merely because there aren't any other men to choose from. These are women that have such powerful abilities in the spirit, that hold incredible destinies and identities. Destinies that would never allow those men to even keep up with them -- and yet they seek for their attention and approval. It shocks me at how little these women believe they deserve.
I can’t believe I am saying this but I think a lot of us, as women of Christ, need more pride in who we are. Modesty and humility are obviously always something to strive for but we need a balance.
My whole life I fought against pride, lowering myself to such a degree that I would be nothing but a doormat for those around me. I went on being used, manipulated, lied to and trampled on. Still, I told myself that this is what it means to be humble in Christ. And it worked, it gave me motivation to keep going. At least until one day, when the Lord came to my door and picked me up: He told me that being walked on is not the equivalent of humility— it was the act of being taken advantage of. He told me that I am His daughter and He’d had enough of watching me allow those people to mistreat me. Slowly and in time, He taught me that having self-respect in who I am is a good thing. All I needed to watch out for was balance. The balance of being humble and not be overrun by pride in such a way that has us acting superior to others. A balance that reminds us that Jesus is the one who lifts us up, for when God lifts us, no man can lower us. And He will keep lifting you up a thousand times over.
The man should do the chasing, for man is to go and find himself a wife. Not the other way around.
Women of Christ, I ask you one thing today: pray.
If there is someone you noticed, if there is a man that has caught your eye, pray that the Lord sets things in motion as long as it is His will. Don’t act on your own accord. Don’t get involved if you can see that they show no interest in you. This may sound old-fashioned, but the man should do the chasing.
There are birds called the red-capped manakin that perform courtship rituals to the female.
If you don't believe me, look at nature, the way God intended things: there are birds called the red-capped manakin, that are famously known to congregate together in a small group called a lek and they come together before a female manakin and perform a courtship ritual. They dance, fly, sing. All in order to impress the female. And if the female likes what she sees, she dances with him and accepts the courtship. How beautiful is that? Even birds seem to have a more peaceful and honest way of courting. Well, if a female bird deserves a male to gather his friends and put together such a show, how much more do you, as a princess of the Kingdom of Heaven, deserve to be courted, chased, impressed?
I promise you God is an incredible matchmaker and love story writer. But even more importantly, He's a loving and devoted Father to His daughters. So be honest with Him, patient and trusting that He knows best and that the will of God will bring forth glory.
If the woman is a gift from the Lord, the gift-giver will take really good care of you in the meantime. And He will enable the gift-receiver to find you.
Remember one thing: as the woman, you are the gift. Yes, the man receives the gift, but you are IT. You are the present he gets to unwrap, the reward the Lord prepares for him. Therefore, God will lead this man to you and gift you to Him at just the right moment. So don't be afraid to wait to be delivered and unwrapped with the utmost care. If you are a gift from the Lord, the gift-giver will take really good care of you and will enable the gift-receiver to find you. You are worthy to be appreciated.
Let’s stand together in faith for what God has for us, ladies! If you feel like you've run out of hope, do it again. Give your Heavenly Father your hope one more time, and this time, do it right!
Single? Have a read of the word the Lord gave me for the singles this year, male or female: